If you are the one in your family deciding to heal, you may be seen as the enemy because you are breaking the family's behavioural pattern.
If you grew up in an abusive environment, you may be continuing the unhealthy patterns and behaviors learned in childhood even after you’ve left your parental home.
When it is the only thing you know, there is no such thing as “dysfunctional”, only your perspective of normal.
It is often not until adulthood, when you may start to ask your-Self “is this normal?” or “why does this keep happening to me?” as a result of romantic and social relationships.
It is thanks to this relating to others in a deeper way that you may have started to notice something unhealthy is going on, thus the inner questioning.
Or maybe, you have noticed it when you relate to your children, and have told your-Self “I don’t want to do these things to my children.”
Maybe, your caregivers also lamented in the same way when they started noticing their behaviours were unfair while you were growing up.
I believe we all set out with the intention of doing better than what was done to us. It is just that many times, we don’t know better, and the idea of commiting our time, energy, dedication, and money to unlearn years of past conditionings, outworn beliefs, and unhealthy patterns seems daunting.
Sometimes, it is easier to continue doing what we are already doing.
To make things even more difficult, when you choose to heal, the people in your family may think you’re crazy or label you as the enemy.
If this resonates with you, I hope these 5 tips are useful for your Trauma Healing journey:
✨ Acknowledge that what happened to you was traumatic.
✨ Find support to do the inner work.
✨ Take inventory of your areas for growth.
✨ Find space for self-compassion every day.
✨ Be more open to conversations with loved ones to hold your-Self accountable.
Trauma Healing is a challenging journey. But daring to do the work is life-changing.
Remember: you deserve a healthy, happy life.
I am here for you.
xx, ~ L.